On the death of Martin Bell

It is with deep sadness that I mark the passing of a dear family friend, Fr. Martin Bell. Fr. Bell was an Episcopal priest (as well as author, musician and even a former private investigator!) who passed through my family's life when I was a boy.

Martin showed me that some things were not always as they appeared. In the mid 1970's and early 1980's, when every Episcopal priest I knew was fairly conservative, Martin always seemed to have a more relaxed attitude. His was the first church service I'd attended where an instrument OTHER than an organ was used in the service, he played guitar, along with his son Mark -- and quite well I might add!

It is from one of Martin's stories that I have taken my online persona of Hatfield. The Legend of Hatfield tells the story of a martial arts master and his trials against Jennings and his minions. To me, the story is an allegory of the Christian's walk, and our trials against Satan and his minions. The story also depicts God as a great silver wolf whom Hatfield is in the process of seeking. Hatfield learns that finding God is not a destination in itself, it is how we live our lives ... and God then finds US.

Rest in Peace my dear friend. And say Hello to the Wolf for me!

Belief + Choice = Situation

There are times in all of our lives when we make bad choices. Invariably, these choices are based in our beliefs, and the two affect our situation.

Not sure what I mean? I'm sure we all know someone like "Walter". Walter finds the woman of his dreams, and he's so excited to have her in his life that he up and marries her at the first chance he gets! They run off to Vegas and get a quickie wedding at one of those cheesy drive-through chapels and go off to live their life of marital bliss. The problem is, apparently his happy bride isn't quite all that happy for some reason Walter cannot figure out. They fight about the same things Walter fought about with his last wife, and so (not so surprisingly) Walter decides that it just wasn't meant to be and he divorces her.

Walter seems to think that if he can find just the perfect woman to marry, that he will be happy. There's only one real problem with Walter's thinking. Yes ladies, I can hear you all the way over here ... Walter is still in the marriage!

Walter is making choices thinking that that alone will affect his situation. Every time he doesn't like his situation, he makes another choice expecting a different outcome. But he's not getting the picture is he? His belief that he is the sole person to decide his happiness leads to his choices of mates; which in turn leads to his situation of getting divorced.

I'm sure we're all familiar with Proverbs 3:5-6 which tells us:
Proverbs 3:5-6: 5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.

You have to understand what it is that you believe before you can make any changes in the choices that you make, and in turn the situation you find yourself in.

Lets look at another fictional person. I'll call her "Marie". Marie grew up in a household where she was never shown any sort of caring. Her father abused her emotionally and told her that no one would ever want to love her. Sadly, Marie bought it hook, line and sinker. So, when in school a classmate showed her any small amount of interest, Marie was smitten. "See Daddy!" she'd say to herself, "They love me!" And Marie would do whatever it took to feel loved. But, as the book title says, He's just not that into you, and the classmate would be gone.

The problem is, each time this happens, we develop scars. Walter has scars, Marie has scars, I have scars, and I'm sure that many reading this out there do too.

Jesus teaches us that He loves us, and will never leave us. No matter what our situation, whether you're a Walter or a Marie, Jesus loves you no matter what you have been told. You ARE lovable! So, if you change what you believe, and see that you are worthy of being loved, then you will be able to truly love someone as Christ would have you love them. And changing your belief will change your choices and your situation

Also, if your beliefs are out of whack, it can have as much of an impact as your choices. If you look at King Solomon (think its in 1st Kings?) we read how God had commanded the Children of Israel not to marry outside of their faith. The intent was because these pagans would draw the Israelites away from their faith. But King Solomon believed that he knew better. He believed that if, as king, he married the daughters of other kings, he could protect his people. After all, if you have a treaty with a kingdom because you've taken one of their daughters into your household, they wouldn't attack you because that would be attacking their child!

So, thinking this way, King Solomon took 700 brides from the kingdoms surrounding Israel. (as well as like 300 concubines and other hangers-on... but I digress) He believed that he knew better than God. And this was Solomon, who was blessed by God to be the wisest man in history!

Sadly, it didn't work out as Solomon had planned. Eventually, there was civil war within Israel. The thousands that Solomon had intended to protect from the hands of pagans died at the hands of their own people. With the people weakened by this, it became easy for the other kingdoms to attack Israel and take them away into bondage.

I wonder how it might have been if Solomon had used the wisdom that God had blessed him with, and listened to his own words:
Proverbs 3:5-6: 5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.

Not even sure what title to give this ...

Where do I begin?

Okay, I didn't watch all of the Oscars the other night. But part of what I did see I really need to comment on.

For those who saw even less of what I saw of the Oscars, actor Sean Penn accepted the Best Actor award for portrayal of Harvey Milk, the first openly gay politician in California. During his acceptance speech, Mr. Penn commented about a group of protesters who were outside the ceremony protesting Hollywood's portrayal of homosexuals in films such as Milk. Mr. Penn seemed to verbally shake his fist at Christians as if to tell us that whether we liked it or not, homosexuals were going to get equal recognition under the law.

Speaking only from my own perspective, I have never had an issue with homosexuals expecting equal rights (as far as things like health coverage from employers, insurance rates ... whatever). As citizens of the United States (or other countries as far as their laws will allow), they deserve things like knowing that those they care about are taken care of if they need to be.

BUT...

(and here I am trying to think carefully before I type; I know what I will say is likely to offend someone, but I wish to make it as LEAST offensive as possible. I just know that isn't likely to happen)

My views are from the Christian Right (in this case 'right' referring to conservative beliefs, not that I think we're correct about everything). Contrary to what the protesters outside the Oscars may have said, God loves everyone. Christians, Jews, Muslims, and yes, Homosexuals. God doesn't hate anybody. He hates the sin we all have in our lives. But no matter how you try to sugar coat it, no matter how you try to make it seem like something that it is not, homosexuality goes against everything we as Christians are expected to hold dear.

Human sexuality, within the relationship of a heterosexual marriage is one of the most beautiful expressions of God's love for us. But outside of that relationship whether it is a heterosexual couple who are not married, or it is a homosexual couple, there's no other way to say it: That relationship is sin in God's eyes.

I don't hate homosexuals. Three men whom I respect and love as brothers are very open about their preferences. They are gay. This doesn't mean that I love them any less. It does mean that I am very sad. When I've tried to speak to any of them, the general response is along the lines of "Well that's fine for you. But this is what's right for me." The problem is, its not an issue of it being right or wrong for US. Its what is right or wrong for God.

These three are not the only gay men I know. These three are simply the only three that I would consider friends. Or more to the point, friends who's opinions I care about. One of them is a supervisor in my workplace. He's a fun goofy man, a HUGE "Trekkie" and just the type of person that no matter your orientation, he's just easy to get along with.

The other two were in a committed relationship with each other, but because the state where they live does not recognize homosexual unions, as far as the state was concerned, they were just roommates sharing a house. I'll call them "T" and "J". Together, T and J owned a small business. T was the more somber quiet sort. If he liked you, he could talk your ear off. But otherwise he could be very business like. J was the more flamboyant 'stereotype'. Used expansive gestures, spoke with a lilt to his voice. Sadly, I found out from my Mother a couple of years ago that J, who had contracted HIV several years prior had died from complications of HIV/AIDS. T wound up losing the house they had purchased together, because the state didn't recognize their relationship and so gave proceeds for J's insurances to his blood family.

There are those among the Christian community who do not want ANY sort of recognition by the state for any sort of homosexual union. While I do agree that MARRIAGE is a union that is reserved for ONE man and ONE woman. I believe that marriage was not intended to be an institution of the state for the disposition of financial rights and familial responsibilities. Marriage is a union set for by God for the raising of children and sharing the loving relationship between a man and woman that most closely models God's relationship with US, his children.

I myself would have no problems if gay couples had (for lack of a better description) a civil union. A contract recognized by the state which would allow for things like the distribution of properties or the imparting of things like Powers of Attorney in legal affairs. I mean, given my "druthers", I don't see the need for it. Legally, you can empower whomever you choose to handle your legal affairs, even a stranger you meet on the street outside your lawyer's office. For things like distribution of properties (like the example of T and J's house) its a simple matter of having the purchase agreement list both names and have it stipulated in your "Will" how you wish for such issues to be handled.

I do not hold with the idea that some people are just "born that way." I have friends who were abused as children. Statistics tell us that abused kids will more likely grow up to become abusers themselves. That doesn't mean that they have no choice. There are options for those in the homosexual lifestyle if they choose to leave that life. Exodus International helps thousands leave that lifestyle. There are choices.

God does not hate Gays. God does not hate Lesbians. God does not hate heterosexuals-who-don't-do-what-HE-leads-us-to-do. God loves all of us. He wants ALL of us to live our lives following Him. But we keep trying to pick and choose how we're going to do that. But we can't do that. Its His way, or not at all.

Sadly, many will choose not at all.

Salt and Light (a look at Matthew 5:13-16)

Matthew 5:13 'Ye are the salt of the earth; but if the salt have lost his savour, wherewith shall it be salted? It is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out and to be trodden under foot of men.'

These days, most of us know salt as a condiment, something to add flavor to cooking. But in the time Matthew wrote this, salt was extremely valuable. Kings paid armies in salt, it was used to preserve foods. So Jesus saying, 'Ye are the salt of the earth ...' he was saying that you are something of high value, not to be wasted. But if something happens to you that destroys your value (your saltiness) how are you to be made salty again? So we are to PRESERVE our relationship with Jesus, and not let it be wasted by things we might do trying to pursue other 'savours'.

Matthew 5:14-16 Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hid. 15 Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. 16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.

Have you ever been driving along at night, and see those search light type lights sweeping across the sky? The kind that are used for things like store grand openings or to draw your attention to some event like a movie premiere. This light is saying to you, "Come look and see! This is something you don't want to miss! Hey you! COME HERE!!!" Jesus is telling his disciples that we are to be the light that draws others to Him. We are to draw others' attention to Christ. As a child, I read verse 14 of this part and thought to myself, "Well of COURSE you can't hide a city on a hill!" I completely misunderstood the point. Jesus was pointing out that a city wants to be where it is easy to see. Granted, it can often times draw those wishing to attack the city, but more importantly, it draws those seeking the city. Merchants, travelers, farmers with crops to sell in the city's market place. A city needs to be seen. And while candles get less and less use these days, I think an accurate translation of verse 15 might say something like, 'if you want to use your lamp, don't leave it unplugged. Plug it in and put it on the table where everyone will be able to see it.'

Like the spotlight, Jesus wants us to draw others to Him. Shine the light for others to see, live your life in such a way that not only do people know that you are a Christian, they see by your life that being a Christian is something that (if they aren't already themselves) they would find Truth in.

Yes, we know that it is by Grace through which we are saved, and that our works cannot get US into heaven. But by our actions, we can attract others to the message that we offer! Something I've said for a number of years is that while it is very true that "faith without works is dead, but works without faith doesn't really do all that much either."

There are also Christians out there that will take their spotlight, and rather than try to use it to draw others to Jesus, will use it to shine their light on what others are doing wrong. We aren't supposed to compare others to ourselves. After all, compared to Jesus, we're ALL as sinful as the worst resident of Sodom. There's just no way that our own actions can justify our passing judgement on others. So, we are to use our lives as a beacon drawing others to Christ.

This should offend someone ...

I originally posted this on the message boards on AotC MUD, and thought to share it here. It was originally written when inspired by a message about the Reverend Billy Graham on the occasion of his 90th birthday.

In honor of the Reverend Billy Graham's 90th birthday today, I'd like to share some thoughts that came to me when his son, the Reverend Franklin Graham was being interviewed on the radio program Primetime America on the Moody Broadcasting Network.

They were interviewing Franklin on the occasion of his Dad's 90th birthday, and having been asked what one thing would Billy say about today's church (Christianity as a collective whole) that was not true back when he started preaching in the 1950's.

Franklin only hesitated a brief minute before responding that the church today was too fearful of causing offense among those who come for services. People who feel that they can get to heaven by doing the most volunteer work for the poor, or can support a church financially don't want to hear that it is not by our WORKS that we are saved, but by God's grace through Jesus Christ.
Today, people want to come to church to hear a topical sermon, something to tickle the ears and that has 'relevance' to their situation and lives. They don't want to ponder the fact that we are all sinners in need of a Savior's love.

The problem is, we ARE all sinners in need of a Savior. The struggle doesn't end when you say the Sinner's prayer. Each day of our lives, for as long as we live, we deal with the imperfections of our human bodies. We must daily depend on the grace of a God that loves us more than it is possible for us to love ourselves or others.
The love of a Savior who left the Father's side, and came down here on earth and took our likeness, and did the one thing we could not do for ourselves. He died for us.

There's no way we could WORK hard enough.
There's no way we could spend enough money.
There's no way we could pray enough prayers till the heavens rang with our utterances.
There is only one way.

Romans 10:9-10 tells us 'If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus,and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead,thou shalt be saved. For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.'

The NRV (New Ronald Version) would read that If you believe it in your heart, and tell everyone around you; and if you confess to Jesus that you are a sinner and wish to be forgiven, then you will receive forgiveness. Because if you accept your sin, and admit it to God, He will forgive you.

Yeah, I know. We don't like having to admit that we're not the greatest thing since sliced bread. We want to think that we're really cool. Or that at least, we're cooler than that bunch over there. But we're no better or no worse than they are. We are all sinners in need of a Savior. But do you want to know the REALLY cool part? Jesus loves us so much, that he's ready to be that Savior!

And Reverend Graham has been telling people the secret for over 50 years. And if you didn't already know it, I've just shared it with you too!

ENOUGH!!!

I am saddened to report that at the beginning of what should be the most joyous time of the year, the time when we celebrate the birth of our God and King, Jesus, that holiday shoppers have let their personal greed far outstrip the true reason for the season. The New York Times reports in an article today that in a Nassau county Wal*Mart, an employee was trampled to death by "Black Friday" shoppers so intent on their need to buy that new gizmo to put under the Christmas tree, that they apparently didn't even realize that they had killed a man.

Also in Southern California, two men in a Toys "R" Us store shot and killed each other. As per the time I write this I'm unsure if this was a dispute over some toy, or gang related violence in the middle of a very busy and crowded store. (Police had yet to comment, pending notification of the families)

In any event, working in retail myself, sadly these stories do not surprise me. They do however sadden me deeply. If I owned a store of any size and had a thought that this sort of thing could happen, I wouldn't care if it meant the end of my business, I would sooner stay closed than allow the possibility of something like this happening.

With so much of society seeming to focus on NOT mentioning Christmas during the holidays (many stores forbid their employees to say "Merry Christmas", instead having them wish shoppers "Happy Holidays") maybe we need to put the focus back on Christ in Christmas.

I don't mean for this to sound heartless, but can you imagine the scene?
Mommy says "Look Johnny! Daddy got you a Nintendo Wii for Christmas!"
Johnny says "Wonderful Mommy! Umm, Mommy, where IS Daddy?"
Mommy says "I'm sorry Johnny, but when Daddy went to buy you your Wii, he killed a man and is now facing a trial for Manslaughter. But he wanted me to tell you that no one kept him from getting you your Wii!"

Where do we draw the line? When does it end? Do people honestly believe that someone will love them more just because they buy them expensive gifts?

Jesus showed his love for his disciples, and he never so much as bought them a tunic. Yes, he showed his love ultimately by dying on the Cross for us, but he also showed his love daily. Caring for his friends, teaching them, being there for them in times of trouble and just simply listening to them.

My friends, I beseech you; before you go charging into the retail fray this year and trample anyone or anything in your path on your way to get that ... whatever your after, take a breath. If you don't get that prized item, try to remember, it is not the presents that you give at Christmas that matters. It is your presence in the lives of your family and friends that matters.

And remember, the retail employee who's life you save, could be ME.

A man who lives for his music

During my senior year in high school, and my freshman year in college, I had the pleasure of spending my summers in the mountains of western North Carolina, at an Episcopal summer camp called Kanuga.

Kanuga is run jointly by the five diocese of North and South Carolina, and to call its location gorgeous simply wouldn't do it justice by any standard. Though on staff, I had the pleasure of participating in many of the camp's programs intended for the campers and conference attendees (they ran other summer programs at the same time as their summer camp), one of which was an evening of entertainment with a local artists. I am happy to say that more than one of these artists did not remain only a local talent for long and one in particular, David Holt, has had his work showcased on the Nashville Network and on public television. David has been recognized for his work, winning four Grammy awards.

David I feel typifies the sort of drive that we should all hope to have for in our lives, but only a very few achieve. His life has been devoted to the rich culture of the music of the Blue Ridge Mountains. He has had the opportunity to perform with and learn from many of the greats of country and bluegrass music, including Roy Acuff, Chet Adkins, and others, but most especially his mentor, Arthel Lane "Doc" Watson. (and if you don't know any of these names ... head for Google or Wikipedia!)

Recently, I had emailed David's website just to drop a note and let him know how happy I was that he was doing so well. I didn't think with his busy schedule he'd have time to write back but he did! I was happy to hear from him. His son Zeb, who is now 32 and working for the National Broadcasting Company in New York City was still in diapers when I met David at Kanuga.

I feel as a Christian, we should all try to live our lives much as David has. Putting everything we have into pursuing what is important (and hopefully) what we enjoy. I also feel that if we put this sort of drive into pursuing our relationship with Jesus, the rest of our lives will be equally as enriched.

I have been inspired by a fellow blogger... (so if you don't like this, blame Deb)

I have recently read the blog of a friend in Boston. Deb and her husband are both disabled and in wheelchairs, but they don't let any of that slow them down (much). With her lemons-to-lemonade outlook, it isn't any wonder that Deb and John are more well traveled in their community than I am in mine.

I have learned a few things from them however. I learned that if you are disabled, you can contact the National Park Service and receive a free pass to ANY national park!

For the longest time, I thought I'd not really "done" anything in my life. Looking at my life through the eyes of others, I see that I have been blessed ... with a Mom who has a "wander lust". Each summer, from the time I was about 12 or 13, near the end of our summer vacation, Mom would pack my sister and I into our car (a 1979 Datsun 210 sedan) and we'd head off on an adventure.

First it was the Grand Canyon. Our family grew up in a church in Indianapolis Indiana, along with several other families. One of the families had three strapping young men who spent the summer as river guides on the Colorado River. OARS: Outdoor Adventure with River Specialists runs guided rafting trips down and through the Grand Canyon. And, because we knew two of the boatmen, they gave us a discount! If you've never been down IN the canyon, all I can say is, GO! Images like this are hard to describe:

More later. Be well and be blessed.

On the passing of a dear friend

Growing up I went to a summer camp in southern Indiana called Waycross. (www.waycrosscenter.org)

While I am confident that everyone thinks that the summer camp that they went to was the greatest, for me, Waycross was it. From the time I was four years old when we'd all come down for family camp, to coming as a camper for the week long sessions (or the coveted TWO week sessions!), to being on staff, and full circle returning for family camp -- only now as the head of the family rather than as the child. This place will always hold a dear spot in my heart.

Through it all, one of the people who was always there was Lennis 'Lenny' Baughman. Lenny was the camp's resident manager from 1963 to 1989. With the help of his wife Judy, Lenny kept Waycross in ship-shape but still always had time for a game of horse shoes (he was the camp's horse shoe champion 12 year running).

Lenny was one of those types that even in the hottest days of summer, he always wore denims and a long sleeve work shirt. He was a country boy at heart, and felt out of place in a suit.

I received an email from my sister Melissa, informing me that on September 9th, Lenny went home to the Lord. His family - Judy, their son Jim and daughter-in-law Jennifer - were at his side.

Rest well Lenny, goodness knows you've earned it.

-Ron

My views on the coming Presidential Election

It is my hope in writing this not to say which candidate is better suitable to the office of the President of the United States, but it IS my hope that I will help you, my dear reader, to find out whom YOUthink is best suited to serve.

The hardest part to me, comes with having to know who you are. Not just what your name is, or where you live, or who your parents are, but what values are most important in your life. This is a value judgment that you will find will change as you grow, not only physically (for those of you who might still be shorter than your potential size) but emotionally as well.

I for one, feel that I have done much more emotional maturing in my life than I have done physical growing, and at 5'11", I'm fairly close to the average size of anyone in my family. But for the longest time, emotionally, I think I could say that I was pretty much an infant. Even now, I know there are things I can be very immature about. Paying bills, doing chores, but I digress. My faith, which while I've had it in some degree for the majority of my life, I feel I have gained more spiritual maturity in the past 20 years than I have in the whole 45+ years of my life.

In my youth, I would have been willing to vote for whoever seemed the most popular. Not because I thought they would best serve in the office, but it seemed more important to me to vote for the person who would eventually win the election, as if my personal vote was the deciding factor.

These days, what is important isn't necessarily whom I think will win the office, but instead, whom I think is best suited to run the office with the values that I feel are most important for leading our nation. I feel it is of highest importance that as a Christian, that we vote into office those who most fully support our views and beliefs. Many who would run for office will try to make you THINK that they feel as you do, but if you look at their past actions, how they have lived their life and run their business in whatever office they are holding before this, you will see where their heart really is.

---

I will give you an example from my own family. I have two sisters, both of whom I love dearly. My eldest sister I am very proud to say has done exceedingly well for herself. She and her husband own an advertising agency in Indianapolis, and they are in the process of moving into a fairly affluent neighborhood on the north side. I hold nothing against her, indeed she is a really HUGE example of how someone with drive and ambition can take a dream for themselves and see it not only fulfilled, but exceeded! My only problem with my sister seems to be the fact that while we both grew up in the same "blue collar" middle class neighborhood, my sister seems clueless to remember what it was really like not having any money.

My brother, my other sister and I all know fully well what its like to deal with tough financial times. This is very much the situation with one of the presidential candidates. For all his efforts to make himself seem like the 'everyman', he's not. And I bet you, some reading this think I'm talking about the conservative. I'm speaking of the liberal! Yes, he may have grown up poor -- goodness knows he mentions it in about all his political advertising -- but it doesn't show in his life NOW. True, in some regards the conservative seems clueless of what its like to not have money, but at least he's honest about himself. He speaks honestly from his view and is willing to listen to others. The liberal seems to be saying, "I know what your life is like, and I know what is best for us to do to fix it!" There are some of us out here who don't WANT your help to fix it. There are some of us who want JOBS where we can afford to take care of our own families. There are some of us out here who want the government to keep our employers from (pardon my language here a moment) screwing us over and expecting us to smile while they're doing it!

---

So I would hope that you spend time in prayer, asking God to help you see the truth about the candidates. About whom you should vote for and whom you feel would best be able to run the country as you feel it needs to be run. Here's a hint though: You don't even have to agree with me! I won't be hurt if you don't! But no matter what, rain, snow, wind or massive swarms of duckbill platypuses ...GET OUT THERE AND VOTE! If you don't, you have no right to complain about who gets into office.

*sings* So high, you can't get over it ...

Ok I admit, I'm borrowing very heavily from my Pastor's message this past Sunday, as my niece used to say, "Get over it!"

I'm reminded recently of the children's church song, I admit I don't remember all the words, but it speaks of how HUGE sin can be, So high you can't get over it/so low you can't get under it/so wide you can't go around it..." The only way past the sin in your life is through the door, which is Jesus. Jesus taught Matthew this. In the hierarchy of their time, Matthew was the lowest of the low. He was a tax collector. In their day, working as a tax collector wasn't the same as working for the "Internal Revenue Service". The Roman government imposed taxes, and hired tax collectors to gather them. Part of the idea was that they would hire local individuals, so that "Good Roman Citizens" wouldn't have to travel from their homes. These local collectors, since they pretty much didn't have any other means of income would charge fees over and above the taxes they were supposed to collect. Some did it because they needed money for their own needs, others, well, others just did it because they were greedy and didn't care who they hurt.

I'm not sure which of these schools Matthew fell into, but in Matthew's Gospel we read: As Jesus went on from there, he saw a man named Matthew sitting at the tax collector's booth. “Follow me,” he told him, and Matthew got up and followed him. Matthew 9:9 (NIV)

Jesus didn't tell Matthew that he needed to clense himself. He didn't tell him that he needed to give all he had to the poor, He simply said, "Follow me." Here was a man that other people would avoid for any number of reasons, but Jesus showed that it wasn't important for your life to be perfect, or anywhere close to it. Jesus even went and ate with them! Sinners, adulterers, tax collectors, and you and me!

There are times in our lives we seem to think, "Well, I'm not perfect, but I'm doing better than THAT GUY." The problem with this sort of thinking is, God does not grade us "On the Curve" as our teachers did in school. You cannot make your grade any better by finding someone who is doing worse than you are, it just doesn't work that way.

Our sin in our lives is like a wall between us and God. Whether it is as thin as rice paper or as thick as a brick wall, there is only one way through that wall, and it is the door. Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.Revelation 3:20 (NIV)

We try and try to work out our salvation for ourselves. We think to ourselves, "If only I could do enough, I know I'd make God happy!" The problem is, there is no amount of works we can do for God to love us. There are no number of prayers, no number of "Hail Marys" or "Our Fathers" that will bring us into heaven. We are called to do one thing; follow Jesus. But in following Jesus, we need to remember to help bring others in through that door as well.

I wish you all a blessed day!
-Hat

Is it live, or is it kugel?

There's another blogger who posts here on blogger.com that I've been reading some interesting things from. If you get a chance, check out Stuff Christians Like. I admit that a few of his posts kind of border on disrespectful, but there are several that really make me think. And that is after all what blogs are for (impo) to get you using your noodle for something other than kugel.

As Christians, one of the things I feel we most need to realize is that there will come times when people are going to look at us and say "Why?" Why do we believe as we do? Why do we believe that Jesus is the one and only way to find Heaven, and why is Heaven such a thing worth seeking? I admit it. I'm not the world's foremost apologist. But I try! There is something about telling people about the Love of my Lord Jesus that defies explaining.

From my observation, I have a few things I have trouble understanding. I grew up in the Episcopal church (Britain's Anglican Church in the United States) and for the most part, I had assumed that I would grow old and die an Episcopalian. There is nothing wrong with that for those that accept the tenets of that faith, but I feel that I have come to understand some different things that either the church didn't teach, or that taught a different view than I now have. For example:
The need for a personal relationship with Jesus The Episcopal church puts less emphasis on the personal, and more on the communal. As I understood it, it was more important that you believed that Jesus died for humanity as a whole, and not quite so much that He died for YOU individually. I recall as a kid when someone would ask if I'd been 'saved' I would give a flippant response of, "Yes, but Jesus did that 2000 years ago. I don't have to do that NOW..." I have come to understand that my Salvation is not just about what Jesus did then, it is about MY accepting that He did it, and about living my life so that others will see Him in my life. Many in my family are still in the Episcopal church. They don't understand me in the least. I wish they did.

You see, one of the things I don't think my family really gets is what we're all talking about when we speak of our faith. When I tell you about my faith, I am not just telling you about what I believe, I am telling you about who I am. I can tell you about my faith. It is sort of like I am giving you a present wrapped up in a box with a frilly bow on top. I can tell you all about what is inside of it, what it means to me. But until you open the present and see it for yourself and accept it as your own, you cannot understand it.

Yes, I am still here. ;)

For those that know me from AotC, it is not news for me to tell you that this has been an eventful year for my wife and I. So much so that I've set aside the projects previously discussed in this blog in order to focus my attentions elsewhere.

Some life lessons have been impacting me, much as a meteor might leave craters on the moon. Beautiful in the end, but sometimes very violent in how they are achieved. While I do still struggle with life as a whole (not emotionally, just getting through day-to-day drek rather than doing something I'd much rather do ... like sleeping! ) I've come to the conclusion that there are much worse things to have happening in your life.

For example, my wife and I live in northern Indiana. These last two weeks, Southern Indiana has been dealing with some of the worst flooding in the state in just shy of 100 years. I guess that just comes to be expected when during these past couple of weeks, that area has been pounded by roughly 4-8 major thunderstorms dumping anywhere from a total of 10-14 inches of rain. (Very tiny upside, had this been mid winder rather than early summer, 1" of rain equals something like 10-12" of snow. Or, they would have been buried under 8-14 feet of snow)

So, all in all, I'd say I'm surviving quite nicely. If you happen to be anywhere in the state, have a heart and find a way to help out those in need down there right now. I'd consider donating to the relief efforts of the local station of the Moody Broadcasting Network, WGNR Radio, 97.9 FM.

On the issues of what my "Fellowship Hall" will be about, while MUDDING (see almost every post before this) will still be a very strong presence, I will start looking into the sorts of issues that make me "tick". Issues of my faith, issues of living a Christian life in a clearly non-Christian world and ... whateverelse I think to speak about.

Greetings friends!

As promised, I am working on a list of muds that I've visited (criteria being I have to have spent at least 10 hours on them, to assure that I have given them a fair chance). While I do have several that will eventually start the list when I officially post it, thus far I only have two entries. These two are for Ark of the Covenant and Emperia, a secular Rom mud with many of the same stock areas that AotC has!

Both muds have very helpful staff and players, in fact in all aspects I have listed as criteria, they scored nearly identically, with one exception: Emperia, being a secular mud, does not attempt to curtail players use of profanity unless it goes to an extreme. The staff will enforce rules asking player to respect each other, but the sorts of "lesser" profanity that makes it into everyday conversation and in the media is not restricted. For this reason only, while AotC has a "G" rating on their language, Emperia got a "PG" rating. (worst I'll give is an "R", and I think I might have to give at least one of those in time)

But for now, just know that the project is still in the works. I thank any who have stopped by!

In His blessings,
-Ron

Secular muds I've visited (some good, some not)

I have also visited a number of secular mud games. These games are not necessarily bad, but they don't offer any sort of ministry. They are simply games for the sake of gaming.

In my experience, the flavor of a mud relates strongly to the beliefs of the Wizards, Immortals or Staff that run the game. If the staff have strong Christian values, their values will reflect in the game whether the game itself is intended as a Christian ministry or not. At the very least, they will more readily enforce rules that require players to treat other players in a respectful manner.

To this end, I intend (when I figure out HOW...) to set up a listing of muds that I have spent at least 10 hours on. These muds will be graded on:

1. Staff friendliness: Do the people in charge actually interact with the players or do they tend to be standoff-ish?
2. Player helpfulness: Do the non-staff players make any effort to assist other players, or do they watch and laugh as you fail?
3. Ease of gameplay: Are the instructions and helpfiles easily understood? Is it easy to find your way around from one area to another? Are mobs set appropriately for the levels they are in?

Each of these criteria will be graded on a 10 point scale, with of course 10 being the best score and 1 being worst. The three scores for each mud will be averaged to give an overall score for the mud. While I will make note if a mud considers itself to be Christian or not, ALL muds will be graded on these same criteria. I will make notes as to Christian or non-Christian, and will give warnings about things like the types of language allowed.

So, if a mud has a C-7-G rating, that will indicate a Christian, score 7, language rated G mud.

I will post these ratings, likely in a linked page. These grades are entirely subjective on my part and thus are only my opinion. I will offer opportunity to rebutt any scores I give. Check back and I'll post when I've compiled my information.

MUD's wanted ...

As I stated when I first started this blog, part of what I'm wanting is a place for people from multiple muds to meet to share aspects of their game. My only requirement for listing here is simple, asside from the general aspects of mudding, the game must be a place where Christian principles are taught and are part of the guidelines of gameplay.

At the present time, to my knowledge, the only MUD that fits this description is Ark of the Covenant (link provided for those viewing this from my link at Crosswalk/Christianity.com). Email me if you are aware of another Christian mud. I will check it out, and if I like what I see, I will provide a link to it here.

I was going to post this on the game ...

But instead I decided to post it here. Any who read this are welcomed and encouraged to respond, either for or against, but, while I will not edit posts for opinions that disagree with mine, I do reserve the right to edit posts that are abusive or which flame other people in the AotC community or their families.

Hatfield: My only response to this issue (at least in open forum)
To: all
Long and short of it, if we are not the ones directly involved, its NOYDBB (none of your dad-blamed business). So far, all I have is "this person said this" or "that person did thus-and-so." I'm not going to get into the details of what I may or may not know, because depending on who you're talking to, not all of it is relevant anyway!

My brother-in-Christ, Cyto expressed the opinion that Paul was admonishing the church to deal collectively with the sins of the body, and he made reference to 2nd Corinthians chapters 12 and 13. Having taken some time to prayerfully consider Paul's words there, I don't think this quite fits our present situation.
In those chapters, Paul is writing to the church at Corinth. Near the end of chapter 12 (at verse 21) Paul states "I am afraid that when I come again my God will humble me before you, and I will be grieved over many who have sinned earlier and have not repented of the impurity, sexual sin and debauchery in which they have indulged." Paul continues (chapter 13)"This will be my third visit to you. 'Every matter must be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.' 2 I already gave you a warning when I was with you the second time. I now repeat it while absent: On my return I will not spare those who sinned earlier or any of the others, ... 5 Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you--unless, of course, you fail the test? ... 10 "This is why I write these things when I am absent, that when I come I may not have to be harsh in my use of authority--the authority the Lord gave me for building you up, not for tearing you down."

Here I think Paul is speaking to the body collectively, what we are dealing with is an issue between individuals. If Cyto felt that AotC as a whole was in a sinful nature, these verses might prove relevant, but I don't think it is.
(and yes, I prefer the clarity if the NIV, you are welcomed to read 2Cor 12:21, 2cor 13:1-2, 5 and 10 here)

In the Gospel of Matthew 18:15-17, we read:

15 If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. 16 But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.' 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.

If we have a problem with our brother or sister, to go to them privately, and seek an end to your conflict. If you are able to resolve your issue this way, you have gained a soul for the Kingdom!
But, if you cannot resolve it this way, bring along a witness or two, someone to not only assist, but to be able to attest that you have indeed tried. Just my opinion THIS is about where Kal and the parties involved had been when others started creating the larger mess.

This is just my personal observation, but I feel that anyone OTHER than Kal, Gen, Quiran (and others directly involved ... meaning not ME) should let them work this whole thing out for themselves, because we are NOT involved.

We, being imperfect humans, are not qualified to pass judgement on the actions of others. And that is what is being done here. People are judging the actions of others without having the entire story of everything involved. Even if you had all the relevant information, if it is not happening to YOU, you still don't have the right to judge others.

Why is this bothering me so? I'll tell you why.
The witness that we are supposed to give those outside of the church is more than just coming up to them to tell them about Jesus. You can gladhand people all day and tell them about God's great and wonderful love and the sacrifice of Jesus on the cross ... But if you then turn around and start squabbling with your 'brothers' and 'sisters' and backbiting them about this or that matter, those outside the church who see this will think to themselves, "Who do those Christians think they are? They're no different than we are!"

You want proof of what I say? (sorry for using you as an example Molly) Molly has been around here in one form or another all the way back to when my wife and I first started playing here. "Miri" as she was known then, would take the two of us through Underdark leveling. Molly has not kept any secrets about her beliefs. She is not a Christian. Plainly, our actions of late haven't given her any reason to consider our message to be any better or different than any secular belief others may have. The result? A woman that I consider a close friend (as does my wife "Scarlett"), is deciding that maybe she doesn't need to be spending as much time here. How's that for a witness?

I close asking everyone who's not involved to BUTT OUT, and let Kal and the others work this issue out for themselves.

I support the decision Kal has made, because I don't know all that's involved and it is not my place to gainsay the choices that he has made. I do however also love my sister-in-Christ, Geneva and her family and it is my hope that she and Kal are able to work through their differences.

In Christ's blessing,
Ron

Mass exodus from AotC's staff

I still as yet have found the cause of dispute, but recently there has been a disagreement between members of AotC's staff. Whatever the disagreement was about, it was so strongly felt by some as to stop being members of the game's staff.

Saddened does not even begin to cover how I'm feeling about this. These are people who have been putting good portions of their lives into this ministry, and for all intents and purposes are now just throwing it away. I've tried to find out, to at least have some idea what to pray about, but the most anyone is saying about any of it is just that there was an argument between the founder of the game and one of the top admins. The admin was released from their post, and a number of other staff have left supporting their side of the issue.

I'd write more, but now I'm just rambling and there's not much else to write.

Tell me more about this "MUD" thing ...

Here's how the typical mud opening screen might look:

Welcome to:
                     --"Ark of the Covenant" Beta 2.6l -

                      Based on ROM Version 2.4b4a Beta
           Original DikuMUD by Hans Staerfeldt, Katja Nyboe,
.========. Tom Madsen, Michael Seifert, and Sebastian Hammer. .========.
//  ,".`'  \       Based on MERC 2.1 code by Hatchet,         //  '.`".  \
||         |                Furey, and Kahn                   ||         |
|| I .'..' |        Quest Code (c) 1996 Ryan Addams           || VI.'.,".|
|| II .'..'|     Quest Code (c)  re-written by Intense        || VII..'..|
|| III`.'."|   ROM 2.4 copyright (c) 1993-1996 Russ Taylor    || VIII,'.'|
|| IV ,','.|      AotC MUD (c) 1998-2006 AotC Ministries.     || IX.'".'.|
|| V '..'.'|   AotC is a creative co-operative ministry of    || X .'..',|
.\_________/             Intense, Kal, and Nyxll.             .\_________/

By what name do you wish to be known?

(had to do a little html edit and use preformating tags so that would look right...)

This is the screen that you would sign in on from AotC. The two drawings of the tablets of the 10 Commandments is what is called an ascii drawing. The gobbledy-gook in the middle is information on what particular kind of mud AotC is and credits for the people who worked toward making it what it is today, including AotC's founders, Intense, Kal, and Nyxll.

Once you create a character (pretty much like logging in for the first time onto a chat site, except you get to choose things like a weapon and what race you are.

Here's an example of a "room" you would find on AotC:

A Beautiful Sanctuary
  There are no windows inside, but a lamp on a table on the eastern wall
lights the temple. A strong aura of protective power and holiness permeates
the air of this holy place.  The flames from a roaring fire send shadows
flickering over the priest and the golden carvings in the walls.  The quiet
movements of the priest echo around the space, mingling with the low murmur
of his constant prayer.  In the middle of the room there is a donation pit
for the needy, and halfway along the length of the temple is a golden
curtain rail with a rich, purple curtain hanging from each side.  It looks
as if the two curtains were once one, and were ripped apart. At the far end
of the room, there is an altar made of twelve stones.

[Exits: north south west up]

   A pit for donations is in front of the altar.
(Golden Aura) (White Aura) A priest stands here praying for the recovery of Old Zion.

If you type LOOK CURTAIN, you will see a seperate description of what the "curtain" in the room looks like. The screen also shows your directions you can move in the bracketed box labeled "Exits". The priest that you see is what is called a mob, it is a program representing a part of the game that you can interact with. In this case, if you've been running around fighting nasty critters (other mobs), the priest will heal your wounds. Sadly, there are no "HMOs"...so you'll have to pay him for his services.

I could fill pages with what you could do with even just a few flicks of your fingers, but I would much rather just invite you to come join me some time and let you experience it for yourself.

Who is Hatfield?

For those that know me from MUDding, the primary name I use for my character is Hatfield.

Hatfield is a character from a short story by Fr. Martin Bell, an Episcopal priest and friend of our family. Fr. Bell's first collection of short stories, The Way of the Wolf is available at his personal webpage, www.barringtonbunny.com. Hatfield was taken from his third collection, Return of the Wolf, which is out of print, but can still be found through sources such as used book stores or Amazon or Books-a-million.

Reader's digest version of the story: Hatfield is a metaphor for every man's journey in search of God. He is a blind dhariki master (sort of a martial arts thing) in search of the lair of the Wolf. In his journey, his arch nemisis Jennings (along with his henchmen Nefid, Drow and Tolak), attempts on several occasions to turn Hatfield asside from his path. By the end of the story, Hatfield realizes that the end destination is not what's important, it is the journey. He won't find the Wolf's lair, the Wolf will find him.

If you don't know my by the name Hatfield, you might know me as either Jamie or Murta(u)gh. These are characters taken from a series of novels by author Diana Gabaldon called the Outlander Series; including Outlander, Dragonfly in Amber, Drums of Autumn, Fiery Cross, and A Breath of Snow and Ashes. Fair warning, some points in the stories in these books are a bit more mature in subject matter. There is moderately explicit descriptions of relationships between the two main characters, but as the characters are married, I only offer warning because it might be a bit shocking if you're not expecting it.